When you hear the word flock, who and what do you associate it with?
I’ve always been a homebody. I like being by myself and with myself. At first, I always associate it with being shy, timid and anti-social. I thought it has something to do with my self-esteem…that I am not confident enough.
Growing up, I’ve always been told of my need to loosen up, of my need to get out and mingle and have fun. I was made aware that there could be something wrong with my social skills. I believe so too.
As I get older, not a lot has changed. I’m still quite the homebody. I talk to strangers and have no qualms about starting a conversation. I look people in the eyes. I smile and am quite good with acknowledging their presence. But…I don’t open up to just anyone. I don’t have my own flock. I still am with myself and by myself most of the times.
Can a crowd of two or three be considered a flock?
You see, I like my crowd small. If you ask me how many close friends I have or if I have someone I consider a best friend, you’ll be surprised at my response. Not too many people know me. What my strengths and weaknesses are. Or how shallow I can be. What makes me laugh. What makes me excited. What and who makes me cry. The type of songs that I listen to. The things that give me goosebumps.
But then, I realized that like any other flock…no matter how big or small the crowd is, you may be of the same kind but not always of the same mind.
We are but….
A gathering of many faces.
A converging of many differences.
A cluster of different thoughts.
A swarm of many characters.
All is considered a game.
Everything is just a game.
I play not to be superior but to be equal. I play not to be above but to be at the same level as everyone. I play not to take away but to give more of what I have . I play not to hurt…but to love. I play not with everyone..but with my kind of flock.
“Men should be judged not by their tint of skin, the gods they serve, the vintage they drink, nor by the way they fight, or love, or sin, but by the quality of the thought they think.” -Adela Florence Nicolson-
In the end, you either learn to play along with the flock or just fly away….